Chapter 1: Parenting Book Entry

Being the awesome you


Till this day I am still confused on why we as women feel we need to waste time being someone else. To be frank this is still a constant struggle that I deal with but am slowly mastering the art of accepting and be contented with who I am. A few years ago, in my journey to discover who I truly was and to find out what my true purpose on life was, I tried emulating people who I respected and wanted to be like.

My personal role models were Oprah Winfrey, who is a well respected and famous icon for women worldwide. I observed how she was passionate about what she did and ran after what she believed in. I knew I wanted to be like her but more customized with an Asian feel.

However my aspirations to be like her was also clouded with other people whom I wanted to be like as well. I wanted to be continuously dressed in power suit like the actresses in Alley McBeal and wanted to live the corporate lifestyle.

I imitated woman of this style, their mannerism, the social circles they mixed with and even the type of clothing they wore. Why? Well, all because I respected them and thought they were successful. To me personally, I can’t listen or emulate anyone I don’t respect and that was a key reason to why I was so easily convinced by their behavior and actions. I felt I needed to be like them in order to fully achieve my maximum potential.

But, the more I role modeled the array of different woman I felt torn apart. Yes, I wanted to be like Oprah Winfrey because….and in the corporate world like…. But they each had a different style, adopted different beliefs, mixed with different people and I was continuously trying to do everything they did coupling that with stuff that I enjoyed to do and felt fulfilled in doing. I was overly bogged down trying to be like them and not focusing on what was best for me. What was I thinking? Living more than 3 to 4 lives on top of mine was physically impossible given the standard 24hours we each are blessed with.

I knew I wanted to break out of the race of trying to be a poor imitator of someone(s) else.

I do agree strongly in the power of older council, learning from their wisdom due to their higher intellect or wise collection of experiences but not trying to become like them.

We are each unique, created from the uniting of our father’s and mother’s seeds and carefully crafted by God. No two of us are the same and the scientific explanation is that we each have a unique DNA code that if were to be read, would taken over 90 years. We are each fashioned for a different purpose in today’s history and we have to accept that we have to carry out such purposes in the comfort of our own skin. Yes, it is good to be inspired by others and strive to improve our strengths and weaknesses, that’s all good and I’m not going to argue against that. But the danger and destruction comes when you compare and sulk about what you don’t have and have too much of (tummy and fats :) ) I realized it the hard way to fall in love with myself everyday and to accept that fact that I can never be anyone else; only a better me.

I realized life was really revolved around the choices you made and I feel that we are who we are because of the choices we make in life. Our choices, topped with our genetic strengths and weaknesses plus the influences we gather and discard from the different people we meet and the different situations that we go through. Its all about the choices we decide to live by and the people we choose to spend our time with and the challenges we choose to embark upon.

Given that I knew that who I wanted to be tomorrow did not have to depend entirely on my past. I believe our past brought us to who and where we are today but its what we do today that direct our future. So its about living in the now and living that to the fullest and not regretting any choices we make.

Recently, I have chosen to view life differently and embrace who I am. I get irritated and feel compelled to change the mindset of many who are bogged down by the typical argument of the half filled half empty glass concept.

A majority of people are overly concentrated on making a statement that something in life is half filled, focusing on the weakness of stuff and never letting go and seeing things in totality, or in the light. We categorize these people as the pessimists in our society. Others on the other hand like to categorize themselves as the optimistic people, looking at the same situation or glass per se and saying that it is half filled. They are one step closer to realizing the fullness of that situation but still falling short of the totality of the situation.

In my perspective, I like to not accept either argument. Let me provide you with something that is thought provoking. Why not look at the glass as 100% full? You might question my intellect and not understand what I am trying to say. But think of it this way, the glass is always filled, half filled with air and half filled with water. Cool right? Well let me take it a notch higher, I like to think of the glass as more than 100% filled? How is this possible? And how can something ever be more than 100%? Well look at the glass again. Notice that it doesn’t have a lid on it, hence not preventing any air from flowing in and out. Hope you see where I am getting with this. The glass is more than filled because the air is not contained and actually flows out giving life to those around it. It is not confined and it can not even be measured because it goes out into the universe.

Pretty awesome right? Ingenious? Well I like to think so too. But all glory goes to God cause its Him who gives me the power and creativity to come up with concepts like this that I share freely share with you all.

So woman who truly knows herself can give freely, knowing that it doesn’t take anything away from her, because she is giving out of her abundance and leaving plenty for herself on the inside.

Knowing such revelations keeps us going. Its knowing your destiny that there was a reason why you were put on this planet to extend a helping hand to other and knowing that giving something whether a smile, love, a hug or even money can only further strength you and will not cause you any lack if you live out of your abundance, which again is your choice.

Dr. Martin Luther King Jr, said “Everyone has the power of greatness” noticed that he said greatness and not fame? In my perspective greatness is determined by the level of service offered and the pure intentions behind it. It is not about the level of glory or feel-goodness that you can get but its about how much you gave to other to make them feel that special way.

I used to struggle with this because I wanted to bask in all the glory and get recognized in the papers, media and magazines for what I have accomplished and for how good I was. However, I knew that could not take the full glory for anything that I did. I realized that it was the team that supported me. No one on this earth is a lone ranger and we weren’t created to be such, cause even if we were suppose to be alone and get full glory for what we did. We need others to recognize our effort and give us the fame and glory. So isn’t that dependence on other and recognizing the importance of leaving goodwill wherever we go?

Since young I understood the power of giving. I got a natural high from seeing other benefit and empowered by the words I gave to them. I knew from young that I wanted to teach others to realize their full potential and grasp the powers that they were born with……

To be continued…..